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Chirps Official Liao News Dispatch


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#1 Paramemetic

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Posted 27 December 2014 - 05:35 AM

OFFICIAL DISPATCHPRESSLINE: Establishment of CAPELLAN HEADQUARTERS FOR INFORMATION REVOLUTIONARY PRESS SERVICE (CHIRPS) - OPENING OF DAVION BORDER STATES to welcome REFUGEES - NOBLE TETETAE DEFENDERS CLASH WITH DAVION CHILD SOLDIERS - TCAF and 4TCR PEACEKEEPERS maintain order in REFUGEE CAMPS

Recently word has reached the Head of Information from numerous sources infiltrated deep within Davion's highest levels of command that Davion has been spreading misinformation regarding the numerous and complete victories obtained by the noble Mechwarriors of Liao and the glorious Tetatae Warriors of the Word of Lowtax. For the benefit of all honorable and righteous people throughout the Inner Sphere, it is important that this misinformation must not be believed. For this reason, top birds at the Word of Lowtax have established the Capellan Headquarters for Information Revolutionary Press Service, your source for true and honest information regarding the minor uprising of misguided Davion loyalists in remote planets within the Confederation.

Recently, because of their insane jealousy at the quality of life experienced by all Capellan citizens, extremists from Davion space have been flocking to Liao borders in droves. It should be noted that under the divine guidance of the Chancellor, many of these refugees have been allowed to occupy minor outlying planets nonviolently. It is the official doctrine of Liao never to kill the harmless women and children who are fleeing the oppressive capitalist regime of Davion, despite that these feeble and helpless people have, on occasion, damaged automatic labor drones on these outlying planets. Furthermore, due to lack of training and general intelligence, many of these refugees have destroyed their own generators in the camps we have established on this territories.

As a result of their outrage at their people's flight to Capellan space, Davion has sent an occasional company of child soldiers to fight futilely against illustrious heroes of the Capellan Confederation. Despite acknowledging that these child soldiers are essentially harmless, it has been necessary for noble Tetatae birdwarriors, as well as mechwarriors of 4TCR and TCAF, to merficully dispatch these unfortunate slave-soldiers in self defense, as only a swift death can save these sad conscripted cases from their endless suffering at the hands of Davion command. Why Davion would force children, some reported as young as 6 years old, to attack peacekeepers and relief workers on the Davion border is yet to be known, but it is believed to be related to the collapse of Davion economy and the droves of starvation forcing Davion to attempt to reduce its surplus population, despite the Chancellor's generously granting aid and relief.

In his mercy, the Chancellor has granted control of several small border planets to Davion refugees, which Davion news sources are claiming have been conquered or defeated by Davion forces. Nothing could be further from the truth! Only Davion filth, completely lacking in honor, could possibly consider the welcoming of refugees into undefended shelters a military defeat. However, it is not surprising that Davion would attempt to lie to its people about the actual nature of these events due to their despair at the abhorrent living conditions created by the greed of capitalist exploitation.

Edited by Paramemetic, 27 December 2014 - 05:37 AM.


#2 Psikez

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Posted 27 December 2014 - 07:56 AM

The Chancellor is truly an inspiration to the whole Inner Sphere. What an honor it is to hear of his kind deeds sheltering Davion refugees as they are pounded by the Clan Menace and rogue Steiner forces. As always Antares Scorpions look forward to the right and true information from the Top Birds at Lowtax.

Edited by Psikez, 27 December 2014 - 07:56 AM.


#3 Crimson Angel

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Posted 27 December 2014 - 08:36 AM

The greed of the Davion dogs has no end. Antares Scorpions would gladly accept future contracts from his excellency.

#4 Odanan

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Posted 27 December 2014 - 08:49 AM

Posted Image

#5 Paramemetic

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Posted 27 December 2014 - 09:10 AM

Neither lies nor denial will be found in CHIRPS official dispatches, only the glorious truth of the Chancellor's numerous virtues and military successes.

Davion rats would have you believe that their starving masses, turning on themselves and their peaceful and prosperous Liao neighbors out of desperation as the Davion plutocrats extract even the milk from the mouths of babes for profit, represent an organized military force, but the entire Inner Sphere knows that the Davion military is consistent only of children and starving conscripts.

How can we blame these exploited child-soldiers that confusedly attack the mighty Birdwarriors of Lowtax, the noble 4th Tau Ceti Rangers, and the excellent Tikonov Commonality, among others? Still, it is harrowing and taxing, seeing so many millions of helpless conscripts, seemingly barely able to reach the pedals on their mechs, slaughtered effortlessly by our valiant defenders. Only the Chancellor's divine mercy gives us the strength to not only remain compassionate towards these unfortunate icchantika, but to generously share our bounteous wealth with them by sparing them some small planets for their refugees.

Those who would like to repay the Chancellor's generosity with service are of course welcome to do so, the Chancellor's supreme generosity ensures the People's wealth with every trivial victory against Davion's so-called "forces."

Edited by Paramemetic, 27 December 2014 - 09:11 AM.


#6 MischiefSC

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Posted 27 December 2014 - 03:29 PM

See, this is what I expected. Much better, fun for everyone.

It is a sad and unfortunate state of the Clanner border that a perpetual, ruthless and implacable 'wave of refugees' is going to keep exploiting the boundless generosity of the Capellan military, world by world, until the whole slice of green pie is nothing but 'Davion administered refugee planets'.

#7 StillRadioactive

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Posted 27 December 2014 - 03:59 PM

More RP, more good fights, MORE FUN FOR EVERYONE!

If I'd known a little soundcloud recording would get this kind of a reaction out of Liao, I would've done it sooner.

Added bonus: you've been conscripting a bunch of child soldiers today too. Maladar's been 60+/60+ all day. Couldn't ask for a better fight.

Russ even tweeted about it.

https://twitter.com/...916148851339265

#8 MischiefSC

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Posted 27 December 2014 - 07:08 PM

If we win, we get chocolate covered peanutbutter bars and can play on the monkey bars instead of having to take nap time.





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