71 replies to this topic

[HARDKOR]

So, like most of you, I like to get absolutely knackered when I drive my mech, and recently, I have noticed an uptick in unsportsmanlike sobriety. Now, before you make excuses and tell me crap like "they had coms" or "but madcats are OP" or "this game is unbalanced" or "you shouldn't be driving drunk and using a joystick" or "here's your participation trophy", I'm going to loudly talk over you and tell you that you are wrong.

The real problem with this game is that none of you are drunk enough.

Oh, how nice, you can average 800 damage because you are using your bio meta sobriety.

Have any of you wanks considered that you are ruining the game for the 84% that are practically falling out of their chairs?

Every night, it's the same story...

I get home, do a dab, drink a beer, log into the local pub, grab my homies and jump into the group cue for an honorable game of Shoot dat mech. It goes ok for a few games, and then the downward spiral starts. Match scores start dropping, TTK goes way down, and eventually, I am forced to go back to the solo cue, where everyone is honorably wasted and playing fair.

Never fear, I have a solution!

What this games needs, is a drunk cue.

If PGI wants to get RISHASFUP™ they need to address the real balance issues and make a seperate cue for toseof us who are out to have fun an put those dirtbag sober people in their cue. Drunkstomping is like clubbing babies. Sure it's fun, but eventually you run out babies to club, and then where are you? Jail! Yeah, and who wants to go to jail AND not make a pisston of money? Certainly not Canadians!

I'd say I'll withhold my money till I get what I want, but it's payday and I'm about to go home and get drunk. That usually leads to ill advised online purchases.

Whatever, think of the babies.

[Ax2Grind]

Truth. Kind of. But Truth.

[Rhaythe]

[Rashhaverak]

You sir, are a wise man... and I look forward to seeing you stumbling backwards on the battlefield!

[Ian G]

I'm not sure if it's sarcasm, irony or a really wasted guy managing to type without error.

Either way, impressive feat.

[Caustic Canid]

QQ more scrub. I'll stop playing sober when PGI lets me spend my MW:O fun bux on Old Kentucky Madcat premium mash whiskey.

Edited by Caustic Canid, 23 January 2015 - 05:52 PM.

[HlynkaCG]

12 players, 12 steps...

[Baphomech]

The Droogs and myself support you, HARDKOR. It's difficult to properly enjoy the Ultraviolence if one is sober.

[HARDKOR]

MMM, ultraviolence.

Beware, it's 8 PM, just went to the gym, I'm pumped up AND sober.

Hax enabled for the next hour.

[Joseph Mallan]

Murphy's Law has a 2 drink Minimum before group drops. We can substitute Prescription meds IF they are legally obtained (snicker)

[HARDKOR]

This is what happens if I keep it below one drink an hour. Two of those were 1100+ damage, worst game was a 350(except that second to last one, my joystick glitched out and I had to reboot and missed the whole fight)



This is what happens if I play fair. A bunch of those are sub 100 and the best probably 550.



We need a que where you have to fail some sort of hand eye mini game to get into it, and it needs to have global VOIP on it so we can just have jolly trash talk among all involved.

Edited by HARDKOR, 24 January 2015 - 10:27 AM.

[Accused]

lol, that reminds me I'm not doing something right now i should be doing.

[totgeboren]

I have to agree, my match score average just plummets as the alcohol content in my blood increases. After a while it's more or less impossible to do well in CW or in the group cue, so I have to play solo to have any chance of success, but after a while even that is impossible!

Fix nao plz!

[xX PUG Xx]

As a Scotsman I fully back this.

The enjoyment of mass destruction and mayhem increases exponentially with the consumption of alcohol. My average night of gaming involves a half dozen glasses (home measures, so more like triples ) and a few bottles of beer to chase them down (yeah I know most people do it the other way around but I'm Scottish ).

*edit*

I just realised I typed that the wrong way (or right), the beers are chased by the whiskey *shrug*

Edited by xX PUG Xx, 25 January 2015 - 03:27 PM.

[Ax2Grind]

Balvenie. 12 year. Doublewood. That is all.

Edited by Ax2Grind, 25 January 2015 - 02:36 PM.

[Mister Blastman]

Straight edge for life! Drugs and alcohol are for the weak.

Edited by Mister Blastman, 25 January 2015 - 02:37 PM.

[xX PUG Xx]

Mister Blastman, on 25 January 2015 - 02:36 PM, said:

Straight edge for life! Drugs and alcohol are for the weak.

*pfftt* Some people

[Lukoi Banacek]

Mister Blastman, on 25 January 2015 - 02:36 PM, said:

Straight edge for life! Drugs and alcohol are for the weak.

Hard to take you seriously with the cheeto dust all over yer gut as you type this.

Edited by Lukoi Banacek, 25 January 2015 - 03:49 PM.

[Aresye]

I stay sober for the sake of balance. When I drink, things get OP.

[IraqiWalker]

HARDKOR, on 23 January 2015 - 03:02 PM, said:

So, like most of you, I like to get absolutely knackered when I drive my mech, and recently, I have noticed an uptick in unsportsmanlike sobriety. Now, before you make excuses and tell me crap like "they had coms" or "but madcats are OP" or "this game is unbalanced" or "you shouldn't be driving drunk and using a joystick" or "here's your participation trophy", I'm going to loudly talk over you and tell you that you are wrong.

The real problem with this game is that none of you are drunk enough.

Oh, how nice, you can average 800 damage because you are using your bio meta sobriety.

Have any of you wanks considered that you are ruining the game for the 84% that are practically falling out of their chairs?

Every night, it's the same story...

I get home, do a dab, drink a beer, log into the local pub, grab my homies and jump into the group cue for an honorable game of Shoot dat mech. It goes ok for a few games, and then the downward spiral starts. Match scores start dropping, TTK goes way down, and eventually, I am forced to go back to the solo cue, where everyone is honorably wasted and playing fair.

Never fear, I have a solution!

What this games needs, is a drunk cue.

If PGI wants to get RISHASFUP™ they need to address the real balance issues and make a seperate cue for toseof us who are out to have fun an put those dirtbag sober people in their cue. Drunkstomping is like clubbing babies. Sure it's fun, but eventually you run out babies to club, and then where are you? Jail! Yeah, and who wants to go to jail AND not make a pisston of money? Certainly not Canadians!

I'd say I'll withhold my money till I get what I want, but it's payday and I'm about to go home and get drunk. That usually leads to ill advised online purchases.

Whatever, think of the babies.

I love you Hardkor XD.

This made my day.

Edited by IraqiWalker, 25 January 2015 - 04:04 PM.