4 replies to this topic

[Critical Fumble]

I read a post today that suggested (I assume as a joke, or not entirely serious) that the game issues we have are an intentional aspect of a desired "simulation" vibe in the game.

So, what if all our game problems are intentional elements Comstar PGI is adding in to create a derper deeper game play experience for everyone? (In Soviet Inner Sphere, game play YOU!)

Time to dump our game issues in the blender, add concentrations of silly only legal in the jettisoned board, set it on high, and see what pops out!

• No HUD bug.

"I should have listened when they said Windows 3050 wasn't stable yet; or at least not pirated my copy. . ."

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• Black Screen of Death.

Blackout due to atmospheric reentry.

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• CTD

"I knew I'd regret that burrito last night, but I just couldn't resist!"

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• Teammate set as enemy for purposes of base cap.

"Its a spy!"

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• Suicide farming.

"No, no, CARMIIIIIINEEEEE!!!"

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• Machine guns ineffective.

"Did Anderson load my 'mech with a ton of tennis balls AGAIN!?"

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• AFKs

"I am a nobleman sent to make sure you lot do your jobs and uphold- Wait, what? PARTICIPATE!? How. . . barbaric! What if my paint gets scratched? I might even spill my tea! Good heavens, I'm surrounded by COMMONERS! UGH!"

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• 4 fps bug.

"I . . . shoun'ta ad. . . zo much'a. . . tha. . . lokl boosh. . ." [Universal translator: I should not have indulged so heavily with the local alcoholic beverage]

Edited by Critical Fumble, 18 December 2012 - 08:05 AM.

[Kuranya]

This.....
makes so much sense....
I salute you.

[iminbagdad]

lol, good one

[Critical Fumble]

One from the patch notes.

• BUG FIXES. . .CTD (Crash to Desktop) fixes

​The department of food safety did a sweep, closed down a bunch of "mystery protein" burrito stands.

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• Players no longer paid for cap point victory in conquest mode.

Nobleman: "That? The fights were going to quick, we wanted to draw it out and get some more exciting engagements, much more entertaining now, good job. What? Oh, you thought you were accomplishing something other than providing a spectator blood sport!? HA-HA-HA-HA, commoners say the darnedest things."

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• Repair and rearm is no longer a factor in the game economy.

Your boss/manager: "I renegotiated your contracts, don't worry about it. Now go out there and make me proud! Just try not to damage your kidney when you eject. Yes, you only have one now."

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Forgot to add one

• High speed mechs take leg damage from small terrain obstructions.

You failed a piloting check. Wait, no, I mean you scuffle your feet too much when you run. Pick those feet up, MECH-PUKER! [/drillsgt]

Edited by Critical Fumble, 20 December 2012 - 07:20 PM.

[juxstapo]

I would be totally ok with that.. if the "small terrain obstructions" didn't include mailboxes, picket fences, < 6' pine saplings, very small rocks, doghouses, porch lights, rhododendrons, fruit vendor stands, my copy of Joseph's Technicolor Dream Coat, a herring, a pack of trumps with a few missing, a bottle of Retsina, a cat, Trolley, a green monster in a trashcan, her Royal Highness' matched luggage, the Patriot Arrow, Glamdring (and Orcrist), a hyperintelligent shade of the color blue, Pat, Rocket Number Nine, an ES-355 named Lucille, a set of wooden dentures, an empty bottle You Can Put Things In, the Noc list, a Holley with mechanical secondaries, a porcelin bathtub dropped from the second story, a three eyed raven, Rosebud, discarded plastic Fischer Price kitchens and twelve butcher's aprons