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Mechwarrior Perfekt


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#1 Daiichidoku

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Posted 18 February 2013 - 08:32 AM

1 no MC or CBILLS cost for exp, free to play mean free to play, no unfair advantage for wallet wariors

2 DHS are broken, and Heat Management is unfair. delete heating mechanics in game

3 energy weapons are unfair as ballistics must carry inordinate ammo. make MWO unlim ammo

4 every player account gets free mech bay for every released mech, addition free bays everytime a new mech is released

5 all mechs and weapons are free

6 matchmaker needs to segregate cheaters on TS from non-cheaters

7 all other mechs but mine shoudl have TT armor values

8 LRMs are now sub-orbital, they take 8 minutes to reach target

9 SRMs, dual gauss and dual ac20s now automatically reverse direction and always hit the mech they were fired from

10 ECM will now only play easy listening from the '70s

11 TAG will now have 100% change to blind mech pilots for entire match if beamed into cockpit

12 game autotmatically pre launches your mech into next battle before the match match is finished! no wait times

13 all PGI staff have a one a week tea time meeting with every player to consult with them and keep them appraised of every little thing

14 those playing more than 100 hours a week get paid for supporting the game

15 those playing less than 100 hours a week get paid to entice them back

16 all player automatically start with all proficiencies, modules, etc, plus extra 1,000,000 gxp, just cuz

17 one "easy" button to start match and do everything for you....even today in real life our military tech can do all this, and the game is set in 3050!!!!!!

18 all cockpits deleted, MWO now FOURTH-person externals only

what did i miss?

Edited by Daiichidoku, 18 February 2013 - 09:14 AM.


#2 MoonUnitBeta

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Posted 18 February 2013 - 08:38 AM

I like number 14. 15 made me laugh out loud
Funny post :lol:

#3 AnnoyingCat

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Posted 18 February 2013 - 08:42 AM

17. stop playing the game

#4 SI The Joker

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Posted 18 February 2013 - 08:42 AM

Pre-score of 8/10 because the troll is powerful in this one... but I do hold the right to increase his score depending on how much rage and/or tears this thread produces.

#5 TwentyOne

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Posted 18 February 2013 - 08:42 AM

I really don't like your post, and I don't like you now. You should feel bad for what you did.

#6 MoonUnitBeta

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Posted 18 February 2013 - 08:46 AM

All in good fun guys, lighten up...

#7 Alois Hammer

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Posted 18 February 2013 - 08:48 AM

View PostDaiichidoku, on 18 February 2013 - 08:32 AM, said:

what did i miss?


The path back to your lair under the bridge? :lol:

#8 MaddMaxx

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Posted 18 February 2013 - 08:57 AM

Wasn't quite sure what to make of it until I read # 7.

Missed.

18) No Mech needs more than than 1 JJ (again) but this time they all have no Fuel requirements and you can soar like a friggin Eagle. :lol:

Edited by MaddMaxx, 18 February 2013 - 08:57 AM.


#9 Livewyr

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Posted 18 February 2013 - 08:59 AM

Daiichi.. you suck.

You completely forgot 3rd person view.

#10 Warrax the Chaos Warrior

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Posted 18 February 2013 - 09:04 AM

My troll detector must need to go in to the shop for service. I was all "WTF is this ****!", until I got to #7. Good show.

#11 Redshift2k5

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Posted 18 February 2013 - 09:09 AM

Quote

13 all PGI staff have a one a week tea time meeting with every player to consult with them and keep them appraised of every little thing


This had better include cookies. Actually, I demand a box of timbits

Posted Image

#12 Lukoi Banacek

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Posted 18 February 2013 - 09:19 AM

Timbits is basically the sexual harassment branding name of choice.

#13 Penance

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Posted 18 February 2013 - 09:29 AM

View PostDaiichidoku, on 18 February 2013 - 08:32 AM, said:



what did i miss?


This disclaimer:

Posted Image

#14 Agent of Change

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Posted 18 February 2013 - 09:43 AM

Awesome...

I do suggest:

19. Game is immediately changed to whatever ***** whim the popular yet nonsensical QQ of the week demands.

#15 Death Weasel

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Posted 18 February 2013 - 10:53 AM

Rolling!
Co-workers looking at me like I need medical attention.
People in the lobby starting to scatter.
Thank you OP.
I needed that!

#16 Vlad Ward

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Posted 18 February 2013 - 11:12 AM

Perfect is spelled with a C not a K dummy

#17 Agent of Change

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Posted 18 February 2013 - 11:18 AM

View PostVlad Ward, on 18 February 2013 - 11:12 AM, said:

Perfect is spelled with a C not a K dummy



^ this man needs a humorecotomy stat!

#18 MaddMaxx

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Posted 18 February 2013 - 11:28 AM

View PostVlad Ward, on 18 February 2013 - 11:12 AM, said:

Perfect is spelled with a C not a K dummy


And dummy is a proper name these days, so it should be Capitalized, Stupid. :D

#19 TAsme

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Posted 18 February 2013 - 11:36 AM

XD

U missed the left Mouseclick = WIN Option, with automatically giving u 8 Kills, for the Statplayers

#20 JohnoBurr

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Posted 18 February 2013 - 11:38 AM

I'll admit, I enjoyed this post. Well done. I particularly like the fact that based on 14 and 15, literally every player is payed by PGI to play.





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