37 replies to this topic

[Corbon Zackery]

We had set up a bowl defence set up in winter wonder land.

Over the hill charges a solo Spider. The Spider was shot at by all 8 players stripping it to internal on all sections somehow it getts past only to be blasted by 3 streak launchers from my mech. Like a slot machine the words component destroyed is displayed 6 times.

Enter the Jenner who was 150m behind the Spider everyone shoot at it and I let loose 3 streak 2 and boom it goes down.

The whole thing happend in 30 sec. and commits like bold bave and dumb ring out.

Edited by Corbon Zackery, 26 February 2013 - 12:42 PM.

[BlackAce]

Caustic valley; Random PUG drop. Somebody on the other team types; Good Luck. Have fun! To which a certain player on the other team (I could tell you who, but it might fall under name and shame) replied: Screw that I want them all to die horribly and rage quit!

Somebody on my team typed in team chat: That Guy: He dies first.

No no, I typed. He dies LAST. That way we can savour his tears....

First we killed both their scouts. Then the Hunchback. Then we hunted down the Pretty Baby and the Atlas. The Dragon and the Centurion put up a valiant effort but they went down eventually too.

7-0.

Just That Guy left, in his Catapult C4 POS build parked on the rock in G4... We hunted him down like a dog.

First, I blew off his ears, then one of his legs... and then my Splat ran out of ammo... so I sat there and laughed as the rest of the team slowly picked him apart with medium lasers. He discoed to avoid the kill, the chicken. But I ran into him on the very next launch, again on the other side.

Still savouring your tears.... I typed.

[Levi Porphyrogenitus]

Couple games last night in my Jenner F. Was doing my scout thing, I think on Forest Colony (maybe Snow). After spending the early part peaking out of hiding and relaying info to the team, I went in hard and fast and started mixing it up. Both teams took plenty of casualties, but we were getting the best of things. Suddenly, I lose a leg, right in front of the surviving enemies. Just in time another friendly grabbed their attention and I was able to rabbit, only to circle around and head back in. So long as I was un-hit, my speed with one leg was still over 70kph, and all my guns were intact, so I think I managed to pick up another kill and wound up surviving the match.

Next drop, a team mate from the last one told me to avoid getting legged this time.

Match after that, got legged again, only this time I managed to pick up 2 or 3 more kills while limping around.

Final story, on Alpine, Assault mode. I and another Jenner took the long way around while our team went up the middle. We were going 152 kph, so we made it to the enemy base in good time. We capped it to within a single tick of victory before the enemy made it back in and stopped us - this proved important, as it forced them to go full defense for the rest of the match, pinning them in their box. I then spent the rest of the match ducking in and out of the buildings (love the overhanging catwalks on the terraced cliff faces, they're a life saver). Our team was super slow with joining us, so we were basically 2v6. It got to the point where they asked my team in all chat if they were gonna let their Jenner kill them all.

Sadly, I wound up dying moments before the end, but my late-arriving team had no trouble massacring the surviving enemies. I think I had 700+ damage and 6 assists that game.

[Soda Popinsky]

Alexii, on 26 February 2013 - 11:59 AM, said:

Now Inara must have some funny whoring stories.

She's a companion. It's a very respected field.

[Flyby215]

I was once told that you can not type while fighting because you will lose horribly... a friend and I was determined to prove that guy wrong.

So one day, we decided to do a Duncan Fisher play-by-play of the match.

"And the Hunchie targets Flyby!"
"Oh AC20 to the torso that's gotta hurt"
"Flyby fights back with PPC"
"It's not very effective!"
"But teammate with the save!"

Everyone kept telling my friend and I to shut the h*** up... but too bad. At the end of the match my friend and I had 3 kills each, I was top dmg and my friend second for the win.

Point proven!

Edited by Flyby215, 26 February 2013 - 04:15 PM.

[Chillybill]

well the funniest thing ever was launching into a match in Atlas w/gauss right after they gave it a 90% chance of a crit, it was! my right torso almoast never got a crit, so I changed it to a AC20 and now when I drop I only lose my AC20 "every single match at the start" hahaha aint that some funny ****

[Skydrive]

Think it was last night, someone who I was grouped with was accidentally in a mech he was building up. Was a D-DC, ECM equipped, 2x LB-10X's... and thats about it. Absolutely no ammo.

This was in River City Night, conquest, and he made it to the other spawn and capped it. At the end of the match, he lived.

I forgot a detail with the catch the bucket. Later while fighting the hunchy, a Cataphract 3D joins. I killed the hunchy, and think to myself, I'll just do the same with this guy. I JJ up, and to my surprise, this 3D had JJ (about 90% of 3D's I meet have their JJ's removed). In my head, I'm thinking: "... well, there goes that plan".
We fought it out, getting hits on eachother, me generally maneuvering with him going after me (still in the same area, just add the Y dimension (Jump Jets remember)), and it ended with him killing me. Everyone agreed it was a good fight.

Edited by Skydrive, 26 February 2013 - 09:26 PM.

[hammerreborn]

hammerreborn, on 26 February 2013 - 08:49 AM, said:

I did that once, but to a stalker, and we were the last ones alive. But we had a team kill (or self-destruct) so they only had 6 kills to our 7.

Stayed up there for the rest of the match (I was missing a leg and nearly cored in every torso)

Everyone but the stalker thought it was hilarious, lol.

More making stalker horses stories. Alpine, jumped on teammates stalkers head, told him to ride off into battle. Turned out he was an LRM stalker and I had TAG, and together the Lone Ranger and his missile boat Silver ended up with 5 kills.

Another match I rode a stalker into battle and he was nearly immediately incinerated by PPC fire. I shouted "YOU KILLED MY HORSE *******S, NOW YOU MUST DIE" to lots of "wtfs?". Killed 5 of them >.>

My other good story was ending a match Jenner vs Poptart. We circled in upper city just wrecking each other. Arms were flying off, legs, bits and pieces just littering the ground in a brawl to the death. Suddenly he jumped ontop of the building to get some well needed cover and probably some cooldown time cause of the PPCs. So I shot at him without much effect with my one remaining medium laser before I decided "screw it, it's go time".

Jumped up in the air along with him and sent my 2 srm4s into he basically cored chest, but at that exact moment a guass rifle and two ppcs went straight through me. Both mechs fell from the sky, round was a draw, we laughed at how awesome that was.

[Fang01]

Oh man between the solaris announcing and riding stalkers into battle (totally going to steal that one) I'm dying over here.

Best I've got is i was hauling *** uphill in my spider when this awesome pops up out of the ruins blocking the path. He didn't fire right away, probably giggling maniacally about how screwed i was. Without slowing our change course i pumped an er ppc in his cockpit and hit my jets, stomping on his head before ducking back into the ruins to take the next point.

[Levi Porphyrogenitus]

Was in a K2 with 2 AC10s and 2 MPL just now. The game was pretty one-sided, but toward the end a lone Raven was running around (3L I think, I remember seeing ECM indicators) and pretty much my whole team was trying to shoot the thing (it had one ally left, but he was way off on the other side of a ridge plinking with LRMs). The Raven got pretty shot up but refused to go down...

...until I took a short step off of a bit of raised ground just as it turned the corner below me, resulting in a kill popup. Poor-man's Death From Above, landing my Catapult on the Raven's head, and purely by accident.

[Skydrive]

Alright now kiddies, gather round, good ol skydrive has some more stories for you all.

2 Days ago I was in a new spider 5K that I bought. Now, you might be wondering, why would I have 2 5K's? The answer is simple. It's not a spider, it's an URBIE. Loaded with a STD 100 engine, AC 10, and a small laser, and also 2 JJ. Now, I know many of you may think that it is a terrible idea to do this, well heres the thing, it's fun, AND it packs a wallop for a light its size.

So, in frozen city Im moving at a top speed of 54kph in the canyon, and I'm now at the enemies side of it, behind the dropship. I jumpjet up from the canyon onto the ground above, and see a missle boat stalker. I shoot him with my mighty AC 10, which grabs his attention. Betty also tells me that I am at 25% ammo, which is 3 shots left. The stalker shoots his LRM's at me, I'm 169m away from him. He realizes this, and runs. Thats right, FEAR THE MIGHTY URBIE. He's going behind his teammates, who are shooting at the rest of my team. I make certain to not hit them. I run dry, but he cannot outrun me, I start blasting him with my small laser. Eventually I have stripped his armour, his CT is critical, just a few more shots, AND... comes a dragon... my team has already dispatched of the rest of the enemy team, and this... DRAGON, kills the stalker... prompting "KILL STEALER" which brought in some laughs from many.

The next day, in my urbie of might... Im in alpine... conquest. Im also with another urban mech pilot. Now my team is beating to a pulp a catapult that got seperated... actually think he capped kappa, where the rest of his team went to epsilon. I see him, so I zoomed, and shot my AC 10 at him... dead. My fellow urbie pilot remarks with "NIIIiiice kill steal." Later, we are losing since the enemy team is capping faster then us... we urbie mechs happened to of been the only light mechs.... Somebody said worthless lights, where I said "if thats the case, then why am I the only one with a kill?" This silenced him... and yes, I knew it was a kill steal, which was emphasized rather heavily when we lost... my total damage... was 3.

[FerrolupisXIII]

So, in my group of friends, im known for playing the game on what is possibly the worst computer in the group. having such a low FPS all the time, the running joke is that i can shoot for ****. which, to be honest, i cant XD

back in the days of early open beta, i was working to master my K2. at the time the Gaussapult was still the king build so of course i was trying it out. my lance mates were all used to me running an LRM Catapult, so they were of course confused when i say what im bringing, with groans of "great Ferro isn't going to do **** all match!"

we drop into Frozen City, which is great for everyone. so we start getting set up in the buildings, the usual. start plinking mechs that come over the ridge, the usual. i hear some yells about a commando in our midst, but im busy showing an Awesome on the ridge how its done. i line up another shot, as he reveals himself again. *SHOOM!* the shot flies out...

and Obliterates the CT on the commando that i had heard about. Mech destroyed! ok, i shrug, hearing a couple of the guys laugh and say nice shot. However im too busy waiting for my rifles to relaod, cause that awesome is now giving me the stink eye. i line up, reload done! *shoom!*

CT the Awesome, Mech kill! 2 kills in 2 shots, in 5 seconds. another chorus of "nice shot!" and the guys laughing.

but Lo! and behold, a cry for help. and the pip of an enemy mech on the radar. its an enemy Atlas, just come out of the mid cave. its a K, i see as i lock him, lining up a shot. i cant help but notice when the Paper Doll comes up...

Its a trial AS7-K. and its shoulder is red. I take the shot, *shoom!* and nail him, right in the exposed torso. Mech Destroyed!

3 kills in a row, in less than 30 seconds. my team is now screaming with laughter that Ferro finally learned to shoot! and all sorts of other jokes. we go on to win the match, and i even manage another kill on an enemy hunchback.

one of the best matches i've ever played, purely for the hilarity of it.

[Star Swirls Beard]

I dropped into an Assault match on Alpine a while back to find that every single person on my team running 65 tonnes and up. I think I was one of the fastest ones there in my 64.8 KPH CTF-D. Watching a column of Atlai advance through the mountain pass is truly a sight to behold.

[Ialti]

Soda Popinsky, on 26 February 2013 - 03:57 PM, said:

She's a companion. It's a very respected field.

Not by Ma-aalll...

[Rocdocta]

well i was doing river city 5 caps in my jenner. there were 3 enemy and 5 of us.

Cap 1 we lost a fellow Jenner as we were chasing an enemy raven around the cap. I nailed the enemy and started to move off to cover. we then lost 2 of our other guys so now its 2 onto 2.

uh oh, last firendly dead. 2 onto 1. I saw an enemy catapault plodding for my cap and thought i would run at it, fire and then jink behind cover. 1 shot from the 5 ML and the Cat exploded!

i found the last guy (a hunchback) and just kept on doing straffing runs on it. somehow i killed it after 3 runs. i think of this as funny as we went from 5 to 3 to 1 to 2 and then due to their previous damage i believe, i managed to nail the remaining with a light mech. i would have loved to have seen the look on my face when i 1 shotted the catapult from extreme ML range.

our friendly

[KinsonRavenlock]

If you run 4, 150kph mechs and 4 jumping mechs in an 8 man.
You can each pick a partner and jump on top of them and then make a beeline for a base cap the record is game over at 13:30.
Or you can brawl with the other team. The 4 guys on top warp all over the place and can't hit the broad side of a barn, but if the enemy team tries to hit the warping guy and not the guys on the bottom its pretty amusing.
Fun trolling to beat the boredom for an hour or so.
We did submit tickets after testing what exactly you could do with it.
Whether it could be construed as exploiting is a grey area heh.


Regards
Ravenlock

Edited by KinsonRavenlock, 28 February 2013 - 11:20 PM.

[Grotoiler]

Lt XKalibur, on 26 February 2013 - 12:23 PM, said:

No. Get out. That joke is older than the universe. Its existence is enough to prove the existence of something, maybe a higher power even, which instigated the big bang. Stop it. Now.

Moving on, there was this time I was in my hunchie, heading back to the point in frozen city (assault) where a commie was standing still, capping. I rounded the corner, we stared at each other for a good 3 seconds - Clint Eastwood style - then I pitted him with my AC/20. Triple cartwheel. We lol'd.

Had something similar on Caustic... running my 9Medlas Swayback Hunchie... our team was mopping up the last of the opposition, so i decided that i'd move to the cap to search for their one missing tream member...

Waded through the pond, and as i busted around the hill hiding their base, stopped on their cap point. after a second or so, i noticed a red blip on my radar to my right... Look down to see a Commando standing there, still factory fresh, oozing that new-car smell.... It's pilot must have noticed my presence at that moment as well, because he turned to stare up into my eyes...

The motion startled me so much i sat there, dumbfounded for a second or so before i melted his head off of his shoulders with an almighty disco-alpha of doom...

[Xenoise]

Dan Baxter, on 26 February 2013 - 09:06 AM, said:

Before matchmaker phase 2 and the PPC buffs, I was in a trial Commando in Frozen City. To mix things up, I typed to my team the location of one of the tunnels entrances. 5 teammates followed me through the tunnel, and I found myself leading a parade of 'mechs straight to the enemy base. No hostiles in the tunnel, the only enemy we encountered was an afk Atlas near the enemy base. We won by base cap, with the only casualties being the 2 teammates who went for the ridge instead. I never fired a shot.

Thats not funny, just boring. I hate such matches with all my body and spirit.

Funniest match for me was when i was the only one alive, versus an enemy light. I was piloting a cn9 (gauss, 2xml, 2xssrm), so this small guy was running around at like 150mph, with his damn ecm and i could not catch him. He was hiding all the time. But i dont know what happened, some sort of god take control of my hand, he came out running at max speed, and in a half second i aimed and headshoted him. Was awesome. xD