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I have experience in marketing, so I know what I'm talking about. Back in the '80s, when I sold door-to-door subscriptions to Playboy, everybody was offended and I made no money. Then when I stopped going door-to-door nude, my business took off. This may seem paradoxical - to take off one must first stop taking off - but throughout history most successful business-people actually wore clothes.
Look at the two pictures I drew above. The figure on the left is all naked. It leaves nothing to the imagination. Now look at the image on the right. His name is Andy. Right away Andy has got us asking questions. Who is Andy? What's Andy doing here? Is Andy single? I don't know. But I WANT to know. There's a connection, a spark, a buzz between us. Maybe I'll take Andy out somewhere, get to know him, buy him coffee, go see a movie. And that's the point. You want to hold something back. Restraint heightens sensuality, ignites flames of passion. I'm not suggesting we make a Hentai dating game here, I'm just suggesting, what if people are already using Battletech games as erotic matterial? Do we not want to cater to
Of course clothed Mechs also offer a variety of other battlefield benefits. Certain fabrics scramble short range sensors, have been shown to dampen pulsed particle blasts, aid in heat-dissipation and offer a trendy combination of pizzazz, vitality and glamour. Obviously glamour is not a big priority when in combat, but I think we have a responsibility to make war glamerous again, particularly after that Iraq fiasco.
From a business perspective, clothed mechs, with modular dress designs and customizable apparel, open up previously untapped female markets. And females love to be tapped. The only downside is that Mech clothing might cause chaffing, but chaff's the best countermeasure against ranged missiles, so perhaps we can put up with a little gyro-rash. Incidentally, I used to have a rash in my butt so I know all about uncomfortable itches. My dad used to apply ointment to get rid of it. Maybe someone should design an ointment support mech. It would need an erection, though, for ointment application.
My friend Hotshot is a racist mechwarrior from Finland. He designs Mech clothes...
...but they all fail in combat. I think Mechs would look good in bluejeans and low cut tops which show just a hint of cleavage. My favourite Mech is the Mauler, because it's all cleavage. I used to date a girl who looked like a Mauler. Then she got a sex change and looked like a Hollander. We're married now. His name is Barrack. Yeah, the President of the United States is a robot. I got all political up in this place. Word.
Edited by ERRATIC CHEESE, 05 July 2012 - 10:44 AM.
