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I see a lot of controversy about balance with regards to hardpoints, weapons, and Mech capabilities.
LRMs: Bro, they're OP
PPCs: Bro, they're OP
Boating: Bro, it's OP
Now look. L2P.
You guys don't get it. At all. Remember SRMs? You guys were all howling about them when a splatcat could hump and one-salvo you. “BRAWLERWARRIOR ONLINE!!111”. Remember when PPCs were hot and had a projectile speed of a fraction of what it is now? The QQ of the day was “BUFF PPCs!!!111”. Now that they're buffed, everone's calling for a nerf and a proportionate buff to SRMs. There are some really amazing players that QQ about the balance, but the vast majority of you are mad because you're bad. No amount of tweaking is going to save your souls, and you'll be sure that you'll continue your streak of getting your face caved in. That is, until you Repent.
Are things out of balance? I think they are. What do I do? I go to Church. I go to Church every day. Because there, and only there, I get blessed by Skill.
One day I was on the battlefield with some real mouthbreathers on my team and they all died. All of them. Like in the first 2 minutes of the game, they had all blown themselves up. But then something happened. A miracle. I was in my 4P, cornered and overwhelmed by PPCs, LRMs and enemies that outtonned me by a lot. Then, out of nowhere, I saw a really bright Light. It was the Hand of Skill guiding me towards Almighty Salvation. I cored everyone. The people in that match know full well what happened. It was like David vs multiple Goliaths. I let Skill into my life. I could have simply thrown my hands up and said “Damn PPCs, damn assault mechs, damn LRMs, curse you all!!!!1111”, but no. I was Enlightened. Sneaking around corners and giving them 45 alphas in the face with my 50 tonner, I prevailed.
My fellow Mechwarriors! You need Faith! You need to accept the Hand of Skill! Through it, with it, and in it, in unity with the Hand of Skill, you will achieve Almighty Salvation. Repent and accept Enlightenment!
There are a few Commandments of the Church of Skill:
Thou shalt not run out into the open and blow yourself up in the first 30 seconds of the match.
Thou shalt target your enemy to see his loadout and weak areas of his mech and exploit any weaknesses he may have.
Thou shalt use logical and effective loadouts that are appropriate for the meta and Elo that you are in.
Thou shalt support your team and not go base capping in your 100 ton Atlas clad in armor that is supposed to soak up damage for your team and is equipped with offensive weaponry that serves as an area of denial mech for Skill's sake.
Thou shalt not shoot at your teammates.
Thou shalt go for the cockpit shot when the opportunity arises. That's right guys. It saves you armor, it saves your teammates damage, and it saves you heat and ammo when you take out a bad guy especially when he's a big boy. This has saved my life countless times. It's not a guaranteed hit, but when you miss, it goes to the CT. Win-win.
Thou shalt use cover and terrain to your advantage. If you can see them, they can probably see you. Take your shot and disappear before you can get shot back.
Thou shalt not replace Skill with tonnage. I can tell that you're bad even in your assault mech, especially when you shoot at walls, hump your teammates and can't modulate your throttle. You don't scare me at all and you can be sure that if you're just sitting there looking at me, I'm going to insert a nice round of Gauss into your thick dome and be pillaging the rest of your team before your corpse hits the ground.
Thou shalt learn to manage your heat.
Thou shalt learn to aim.
Thou shalt farm bads for Cbills.
I'll continue my list of commandments later. This should serve as a decent start of things that you should be doing to embrace the Almighty Hand of Skill. Because by embracing Enlightenment, your 50 tonner can work as a one mech army. But you must show Skill your commitment by going to Church. But first, you must be baptized as a Skillian.
I'd like to introduce you to the clergy of the Church of Skill.
Pope, Supreme Pontif, and Holy See of the Church of Skill: PEEFsmash. It is said that he communicates directly with the Hand of Skill and thus has risen to achieve Infinite Wisdom. Because of this, he is said to have Skill-like Elo. His word is therefore the Word of Skill Itself.
Supreme Chancellor of DV8 City: Mongoose Trueborn. His leadership of the Skillian Clan DV8 is influenced directly by the Word of Skill. Through his leadership, Clan DV8 will achieve Almighty Salvation and Enlightenment, wherever the game meta takes us.
Chairman & CEO of the Central Bank of the Church of Skill: Villz. Although we are sometimes very charitable and generous, our Cbills must flow from somewhere. His Supreme Generosity comes from his adventures farming the scrub ghetto for Cbills and XP.
Supreme Benefactor and Figurehead of the Church of Skill: Ryan Steel (Me). Think of me as a public figure like Tom Cruise with regards to Scientology. I pretty much farm Cbills and XP and donate it to the Holy Church of Skill.
Cardinal Poptart of the Church of Skill: RockWolf. One of the First Poptarts in MWO. The Hand of Skill guides his shots to your Cockpit.
Cardinal Headshot of the Church of Skill: Siba. Many of his shots miraculously end up where you sit in your mech. He calls upon the Holiness of the Skill.
Cardinal Best Player in MWO of the Church of Skill: Koreanese. Rumored to be an Angel sent straight from the Heavens of Skill, he does what many mortals can only dream of doing on the battlefield.
Messenger of the Church of Skill: Nuclear Weapon. Delivers Skill's Message in the form of Double Gauss cockpit shots.
Altarboy of the Church of Skill: Soy. Steals the wine and communion bread for himself.
Choirboy of the Church of skill: End Crescendo. His Angelic Voice touches us all with the Word of Skill.
And, last but not least, our Holy Patron Saint.
Patron Saint of Medium Mechs of the Church of Skill: Adrian Steel. Although currently a guest at DV8 City, he sacrifices himself in mediums on a daily basis regardless of the assault/alpha meta and many times meets an Honorable Death. A true devotion to Skill at any cost. An example of Faith in Skill without falling to the Temptations of Assault Mechs.
We Pray to the Skill.
Edited by Ryan Steel, 08 July 2013 - 12:02 PM.
