3435 replies to this topic

[Sparks Murphey]

Juodas Varnas knows how to make a JagerMech dance. He chooses not to, though, as he prefers something that can actually dance well. His displays of choreographed footwork in his Quickdraw have halted entire armies, even before their armour started to melt.

[MarineTech]

Sparks Murphey once got into a head-butting contest with an emu.

They called it a draw after 4 hours so they could avoid permanent brain damage.

[Sizzles]

Marine Tech has a pet platypus. He calls it 'Sparky'.

[StompingOnTanks]

Sizzles, as a child, tried to take a live power wire home to be his pet and new best friend.

Which it was! They become close as could be and never left each other's side for the next 10 years. They read books together, roasted marshmallows together, watched TV together and even played Battleship together, and shared all of their most personal secrets. They were the bestest of bestest of bestest of friends best friends could be.

Then physics finally caught up. They aren't friends now.

[MarineTech]

Somewhere, in deepest darkest Africa, there is a Galago (Bushbaby) named Sid, that has it in for StompingOnTanks. Sid spends his days experimenting over and over to come up with the perfect method for snuffing poor StompingOnTanks. Luckily for Stomping, Sid IS a bushbaby, and is not able to swim the ocean or earn enough money for a plane ticket to Michigan.

[Sizzles]

Marine Tech has the protoculture . . .

And he isnt sharing.

[Sparks Murphey]

Sizzles killed Grendel while Grendel was recovering from his earlier fight with Beowulf. It was an unfortunate accident involving a chandelier, and Sizzles left before the authorities could arrive and ask any awkward questions, which was probably a bit premature because police wouldn't actually be invented for another few hundred years. Beowulf only happened on the scene later and claimed responsibility in Sizzles' absence.

[MarineTech]

Sparks Murphey once set out to break the record of Captain Thunderbolt as the longest roaming bushranger in Australian history. Sparks abandoned the idea after 3 days when he discovered that the deep outback was a very uncomfortable place with a distinct lack of beer, and that people seemed to be a bit confused when he tried to rob them brandishing a platypus.

Edited by MarineTech, 31 May 2015 - 03:02 AM.

[Iothil]

Marine Tech once mounted his eyepatch, traveled the seven seas to colonize all the isles undiscovered. He then, however, discovered he was a coconut. His parrot was named Jacqueline-Monique.

[MarineTech]

Iothil has been into the sauce again.

[Tiamat of the Sea]

MarineTech knows where the sauce is kept. Which sauce? ALL OF IT.

[Sparks Murphey]

Quickdraw Crobat used to be a traffic director in the LCPD (Mech division), mainly operating in canyon networks. After a Stalker reversed over a Commando while Quickdraw Crobat was getting a doughnut, his chief busted him back down to front line combat, though. Which is a pity, because he's due to retire in a month.

[BerserX]

"Sparks Murphy" is one of Waldo's many aliases.

Edited by BerserX, 02 June 2015 - 04:43 AM.

[Juodas Varnas]

BerserX is actually a time-traveling viking that is stuck in the future for going berserk and murdering a poor time-wizard's family.

[Tiamat of the Sea]

Juodas Varnas fires all his PPCs backwards. This would be much less harmful to his opponents if it didn't mean getting hit with a 7-tonne particle accelerator traveling 950 Kph plus.

[BerserX]

Quickdraw Crobat pilots a Quickdraw (real original, huh?) armed with 6 flamers and one narc. His mech is specially fitted with a super-fusion hydro-ionic quantum reactor (don't look at me, he's the one that named it). On flat ground, he can get his mech up to 60,000 kph in 0.000245329801256384 seconds! This barely gives him enough time to fire the narc and slow to a jog before splattering into his target. The narc, travelling at such speeds, punches through the thickest armor and buries itself about 100 meters into the ground (assuming he had time to jump jet and fired the narc downwards). He once took on an entire team this way as the last mech on his side (yes, they were all lined up).

The flamers are just for show.

Edited by BerserX, 02 June 2015 - 12:30 PM.

[MarineTech]

BerserX is able to move faster than a horse. As long as he's on the highway, in a car, and not stuck in traffic.

[BerserX]

MarineTech can move as fast as me, if he's in the open sea, on a calm day, not surrounded by blue whales. He moves much faster when being chased by sharks.

[Nightmare1]

BerserX frequently gets eaten by sharks since MarineTech can outswim him. BerserX also often forgets the maxim: "It's not how fast you can run or swim; it's if you can outrun or outswim the other guy!"

A pistol round to the knee cap can go a long way towards following that maxim.

[MarineTech]

One night, after a round of SERIOUS drinking, Nightmare1 got it in his head that he should go down to the local zoo and pants an orangutan. For those not familiar with the practice, pantsing is the sport of running up behind somebody and yanking their pants down around their ankles. Nightmare's plan began to fall apart immediately when he discovered that the orangutan did not, in fact, wear pants. He spent the rest of the night in a long, drunken rambling conversation with the orangutan, which also turned out to be female.

Sidenote... Nightmare still occasionally gets calls at about 2am that go something like this. RING!!! Blehhh who wazzat who's this? Ook ook ook.... I thought I told you never to call here.