INCOMING: Wall of text!
GRiPSViGiL, on 27 May 2016 - 07:51 AM, said:
Just say it like it is and let people do with it what they will. No need to be a carebear delicately putting things so the fragile get offended. Part of the oversensitive nature of the world today so simply don't cater to it.
So, as good as it feels to say this, and as good as it feels to give advice without any 'sugarcoating'...it's just not effective in the PUG setting. Why not?
1. You have no credibility.
2. You and the "student" have no rapport.
3. You and the "student" have no long-term investment in each other's success.
Let me expand on these three:
Yes, drill sergeants are "blunt" and "direct" (to say the least) but they have credibility--namely the backing of an enormous military and governmental apparatus that deemed them appropriate, possibly even excellent teachers for the raw recruit. In PUGlandia, nobody knows who you are or why they should listen to you. They do not know if you are even being honest or trolling or raging incomprehensibly.
The drill sergeant and the recruit also have a rapport built up over several weeks and months of training. The recruit gets better, the sergeant pushes him harder, and eventually earns the sergeants respect. In PUGlandia, nobody really cares if you respect them because they probably won't see you again, and if they do, it's only for a shared 2-12 minute electronic hallucination.
The drill sergeant has a long-term investment in the recruit's success. If he produces privates/seamen/airmen with poor skills, then not only will his superiors take note, but he is also reducing the overall quality of an organization in which he is heavily invested personally. You have no long-term investment in the student, and he none in you or your advice. You are invested for the next 2-12 minutes, and given the ephemeral nature of the relationship, he's better off listening to his instincts than to your blunt advice.
So while you can be a blunt about it, the vast majority of people will just ignore you. Ultimately they just don't know who you are and whether or not you are giving good advice.
The key then is to use emotional and conversational cues to get people to listen to you. At the very least, this means....
Bud Crue, on 27 May 2016 - 09:31 AM, said:
How about: just don't be a dikc about it?
If you want to get even more people to listen to you, take Jman's advice:
Jman5, on 27 May 2016 - 10:47 AM, said:
1. What I like to do when drop commanding in a PUG is I lay out a basic plan and then I ask the rest of the team if that sounds good to them. 99% of the time people will either say nothing or give their consent. This helps share the responsibility of the outcome more. People are also less likely to finger point if you lose.
2. Don't freak out over people doing something different. Instead try to use their actions to enhance your plan. I play a lot of CW, and it's not uncommon for people to run off on their own and attack through a different gate than us. A lot of premade drop callers freak out when PUGs do this, but I try to make it part of our plan. At the very least they can be a distraction for your main force to relieve some pressure. If things go well he might do a lot of damage to their backs while they deal with us.
3. Don't rub it in people's face when they don't listen and subsequently fail. Let their actions speak, or people get defensive and refuse to admit it was a mistake.
4. Always remember that there is no one way to play. If you usually go one way, but your team goes another way, adjust and support them.
5. Some people don't want to listen. Don't waste energy trying to prove to them that you're right and they're wrong. If they don't want help, f*ck em. let them wallow in mediocrity while you focus on improving your own game and those who want to get better.
I've had pretty solid success with my five principles:
1. Start early: Don't give advice/leadership only after you've died or things have gone to ****. At this point you've lost all credibility. Starting early can also mean simply greeting people to build some camaraderie, get people talking on the comms, etc. to gauge if you even have a receptive audience. If they hear your voice right away saying positive, friendly things, they are more apt to listen to you later. This leads to...
2. Be diplomatic: As Bud said, don't be a ****. For more on this, read the first half of my post.
3. Be democratic: Jman's post is a good illustration of what this means. The recruit needs to listen to the drill sergeant because he is invested in the organization (either through volunteering or in the case of a conscript army by force of law). PUGs are in a completely voluntary organization, one which is completely flat, ephemeral, and in which any person can intentionally ruin the team's chances of winning. Being democratic here means being open to other people's input, and recognizing that you might not have all the answers.
4. Be positive: I hate typing this out, but in the PUG setting, for reasons noted above, you need to be positive (I am myself a virulent pessimist who hates positive-thinking types, but when it works, it works). This means avoiding negative language, but also avoid placing blame.
Put yourself in this Stalker's shoes:
Commander A: "Hey Stalker, what the F*** are you doing out there all alone? Don't wander off by yourself."
Commander B: "Hey Stalker, looks like the group is moving, don't get left behind!"
Commander A used offensive language, and also put the blame on the Stalker. Placing the blame puts the STK in a situation where he needs to defend his honor--in PUG life this is usually by swearing and then doing your own thing.
Commander B used neutral language to state a fact and gave some advice to the Stalker. By not placing blame, and invoking the group, the STK only has to think about what is best for himself and for the group in terms of victory, not personal egos.
Now ideally, "positive" is also forward-thinking, as "Lock Targets! Focus Fire!" instead of "Why doesn't anyone press R? Stop shooting at every little squirrel!" When necessary, I find that negative advice is best preceded by positive advice. So "Keep it tight, don't wander off" is more effective than a simple "don't wander off," and "You fatties look to the firing line, I'll take care of the Spider" is more effective than "Don't chase the squirrel!"
When it comes to build advice this is the most critical principle to keep in mind. Some people 100% don't give a **** about their builds, but many if not most put lots of thought into them and view criticism of their builds as personal criticism of themselves. So start with something positive ("Hey, I like that you're running a Marauder...") and then follow it up with constructive advice ("...but I think that those three MGs aren't really playing to its strengths. Try this....").
And keep in mind that they are putting LRMs in an Atlas for a reason--your job isn't to tell them that it's a stupid reason, but to give a reason that is better than their reason, one they hadn't thought of.
5. Be specific: If you have successfully adopted the preceding four, call people by name or by chassis. Alpha Lance. Assaults. Oxide. Stalker. Jables. This way people know who you are talking to and can respond accordingly. But if you address someone specifically to denigrate them, you'll only piss them off and work counter to your goals.
6. (Bonus Principle!) Be cool when people don't listen to you. They won't listen to you if you're a ****, but they won't always listen if you're nice.
TL;DR: Read the bold parts. Don't be a ****.
Edited by Jables McBarty, 27 May 2016 - 11:36 AM.
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