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maybe your name even betrays your secret perversion ? or you even have mastered and moduled out the little knee-cappers ? the speed of a cruising atlas makes you want to throw up from motion sickness ?
drop me a line.
the CAN-DO Warriors of Dosenkrieg (thats german for can-war. german sounds more evil) are recruiting.
the group of urbieholics anonymous are looking for fulltime trash can inhabitants.
what should you expect ?
- occasional all urbie drops.
- hardcore casualto the brim (coordination is for softboiled eggheads who drive unintoxicated, too)
- on and off urbie faction war: the standard drop deck should be 3 urbies and a mechbay warmer.
- the unit colours are unique. to each of us.
hydrant red, trashcan grey, jägermeister orange, bud light red - no one will make jokes on you for the mech colours. even meat coloured or minion-urbies are fine.
- we are so casual, we dont even guarantee drops, bonbons or lolliepops.
it may take some time to get invited, dont get upset. getting there in an urbie takes time. always.
entry requirement is ownership of an urbie and ability to shoot with it. no one said "hit with it".
other mechs in your mech bay will be tolerated, but we expect you to do your daily chores in
an urbie.
smoking in your trashcan is prohibited for safety reasons: no trash fires, trash cans on fire and attention those NOx bottles may explode if thrown into fire.
urbies may be left stock config, but may also be modded. foxtail-antennas and attaching a merriam-webster to the carburator are fine, too.
urbies are required to be gassed up on five star fuel (four wont do) or chuck norris pee, lest they loose their super-urbie powers.
never feed the SMUrbies after dark, lest you get evilurbies.
starting at a submersion level of 6 feet or more, the urbie driver is required to inflate the palm-tree-island, anchor the pedalo over the AC and open the caipirinha-bottles without further orders. singing la-paloma will be a requirement.
no garden gnomes in the interior. the cockpit is too small for such a thing.
you may drink any beer, as long as it is in CANs.
real urbie drivers dont troll. they existance is trolling enough.
before 4 o'clock is after four o'clock. and beer is beer.
no one likes ankle-biters. we got ACs, lasers and MGs.
flat hierarchies and flat humour only. otherwise we would need to grow up.
no gnome jokes.
no one bends over for the soap. we stretch for it.
NO LRM URBIES. EVER.
EDIT: german thread: https://mwomercs.com...r-rekrutierung/
Edited by Masochistic Trashcan Virtuoso, 12 April 2017 - 12:07 PM.
