3435 replies to this topic

[MarineTech]

Sparks Murphey has a war kangaroo.... Along with a conflict koala and a battle emu.

Do NOT piss this man off.

Edited by MarineTech, 22 December 2015 - 07:00 AM.

[Sizzles]

Marack built a small machine that would emit the mixed smell of burning metal and oil when activated by remote.

He placed this machine under his fathers desk and anytime his old man sat down to pay the bills, do taxes, or anything that involved thinking, Marack would trigger the device.

The man is slowly starting to believe that thinking too hard really does produce a burning odor.

[Nightmare1]

Marack Drock, on 22 December 2015 - 11:33 PM, said:

Sizzles is named such because he made a small grill just under his parent's bed and every time they went to sleep he would cook meat fats so that the sizzling would keep them up at night, in bouts of hysteria and wondering why everything smelled like bacon. When his father found out he was furious until he saw the stockpile of bacon and then called him sizzles.

Marack Drock once went through and entire box of Alphabets Cereal to verify that he was getting his money's worth. To his frustration, he found that he had been shorted on the C's and Z's while he had a surplus of K's and D's. He called the company and demanded an apology. The representative he talked to was amazed that someone had actually taken the time to check his company's product and admitted that they don't actually make the C's and Z's. They never expected to be caught! To this day, Marack is considered to be a Hero in the world of food watchdogs.

[Sparks Murphey]

Nightmare1 hid in my chimney to catch Santa Claus last night. Oddly, I don't have a chimney, so where he actually ended up is anyone's guess.

(Merry Christmas, MUAFFATPAY thread and the rest of MWO!)

[Nightmare1]

Sparks Murphy owned a dog that could drink Freon without getting sick. When the government asked him if it could study his dog, he said, "No." So the government took his dog, shot Sparks in the leg, burned down his house, and left him for dead. Amidst the crashing of burning timbers and trusses, Sparks swore that he would have his revenge for his beloved dog. Now, 85 and 3/4 years later, Sparks has finished mounting the last head of the last government official responsible for the theft of his dog on the last garden stake he had in his pole barn. The staked heads are out in front of his dog rescue shelter to serve as a warning to future government officials who may want to take his dogs. Nobody knows what happened to the Freon Dog, but those of us in the know like to believe that it found its way to the Happy Barking Grounds.

As for Sparks, he can't figure out why nobody will stop and adopt his beloved dogs. He doesn't realize that the staked heads are offputting to more than just government officials.

Edited by Nightmare1, 01 January 2016 - 01:35 PM.

[XphR]

Nightmare1 once tried to make the head collection of Sparks shelter more inviting by enchanting them to sing. However instead of joining in on singalongs or doing requests, they would only sing together in various a cappella versions of 'I aint got no body'. After weeks of pleading with them to stop or even better cooperate he gave up deciding to reverse the enchantment.

[Sparks Murphey]

XphR misunderstood the purpose of my pet rescue shelter, and left with one of the heads as a pet. It lives in his forum profile box where it eats spam and drinks the tears of trolls.

[Nightmare1]

Since 1852, Sparks has wondered why people keep coming to him for help with their speeches and papers. They keep calling him the "Wordsmith" and beseech him for his aid in their literary and oratory pursuits. It wasn't until yesterday that Sparks finally figured out why this was so! The printing company that supplies him with his calling cards had been printing "Wordsmith" instead of "Worldsmith" this whole time! Thinking it was the company's fault, he sued it. However, he lost the case when it was determined that he himself had made the initial misspelling in the first order he issues to the company, even going so far as to misspell it in his signature.

Despite losing the court case, Sparks is relieved to finally have the whole thing straightened out.

[Euklides]

Nightmare has a hobby to make cable housings, distraught at the self perceived degeneration of todays cables, hearkening back to the good old times when the cables were sturdy and the copper thicker.
He sits at a distant lodge far up in the urgalian mountains making thick sturdy cable housing for every apparatus he has; to what ever price it has to come to.
Opening up small electronics and replacing every housing with a new and "better" cable housing, most time at the cost of functionality of the actual electronic. Replacing the cables of the closest neighbours houses at night, granting a gruesome wakening as hanging cables thick and sturdy now occupy almost all the space, how he does this so silently and stealthily, no one knows.
He works while grumbling at the societies lack of cable housing quality and secretly plots to make a strike to replace every single cable not up to his standard.

He is every modern day electricians: NighmareNumberOne.
Not number two. Because that would be lame.

Edit: Spelling

Edited by Euklides, 05 January 2016 - 03:27 PM.

[Sparks Murphey]

Euklides took a Cessna 172 for a parachuting jump. Despite never having parachuted before, the 172 successfully deployed it's 'chute and had a wonderful time, thanking Euklides profusely when he landed on the tarmac a few minutes later.

[Sizzles]

Sparks would never fly a Cessna of any kind. He knows that they are drawn to cold, isolated mountains through magnetism.

[MarineTech]

Sizzles goes out of his way to put down Cessnas...

Basically, it's because he wants to feel better about himself for having a Piper PA-28 Cherokee which was even worse luck staying in the air than the Cessnas.

[Sizzles]

Marine has procured the ingredients necessary to begin the ritual. He shall now summon ALL the demons.

[MarineTech]

Sizzles... Has multiple screws loose.

This probably contributes to his Piper falling out of the sky.

[Nightmare1]

MarineTech is constantly tightening Sizzles' screws. He does so using a DeWalt, 20V, cordless drill as shown below:




Unfortunately, he's had to do it so many times that the threads in Sizzles' head are all stripped. It has become a true exercise in futility and is very frustrating for MarineTech, a perfectionist, who believes that the screws in one's head should all always be tight.

The other day though, I saw him in the hardware section eyeing a pneumatic nailgun by Bosch. Makes me wonder...

[XphR]

Nightmare1 once lent MarineTech a stripped screw removal set but swore never again to do it, the amount or blood, hair and skin that returned with the set was too much even for him.

[Euklides]

XphR is a professional feline entertainer, he educated himself with astounding vigour after hearing about "how much p-ussy(lol censorship) you can work with entertaining in one day" from an university spokesperson at an eduction fare.
How the 9 years of following harsh eduction and physical assault by practice dummy cats did not break him like all the other two students no one knows still.
His work shall not be taken lightly, entertaining cats is a risky and unforgiving practice, many scratch marks is delivered on a common basis.

It is work done for the continuation of the human race, who knows when the cats finally grow tired of what they perceive as humanities incessant self centred nature.
One day they might end the graciously given servitude to humanity, but one man. One man, is working tirelessly, night and day. To make sure that the feline overlords see the reason as to why they keep humanity.

This man, XphR, lobbies for our survival in harsh conditions with no personal gain. He truly is the saviour we need, but not deserve.

Edit: spelling

Edited by Euklides, 13 January 2016 - 05:55 AM.

[Sparks Murphey]

Euklides converted a trashcan into an UrbanMech... or was it the otherway around?

[Sizzles]

Sparks rubbed poison Ivy -the plant- over every square centimeter of his CO's current toilet paper roll, before rolling it back up.

[MarineTech]

Sizzles is so cute, he poops rainbows.

Or maybe that's because he eats crayons. I can't remember.