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Make Up A Fun Fact About The Person Above You


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#481 Smitti

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Posted 05 March 2014 - 09:06 PM

StompingOnTanks knows this because he is the pilot of CeilingMech.

#482 Sparks Murphey

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Posted 05 March 2014 - 09:23 PM

Smittiferous doesn't believe in using propellant in his autocannon shells. If his shells don't have enough motivation to propel themselves, he doesn't want them in his unit.

#483 Smitti

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Posted 06 March 2014 - 03:03 AM

Damn straight!


Sparks Murphey was once relentlessly pursued across the galaxy by what appeared to be one of the most ruthless bounty hunters known to man. No stone was left un-turned, no hovel not searched. Bounties were posted, people interrogated. Sparks, fearing for his life, spent his entire family fortune attempting to stay off the grid, even so far as to buy stolen space vessels and then abandon them in the next system over.


Turns out it was just StompingOnTanks trying to return Sparks' left shoe after it was lost during a wild night out on the drink together.

#484 Sparks Murphey

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Posted 06 March 2014 - 03:08 AM

It's the truth.

What Smittiferous left out of the story is that I never did get that shoe back, either. StompingOnTanks eventually sold it to scrape together the final clues to track me down. The buyer? Smittiferous, who proclaimed that the shoe was the most motivated piece of footwear he had ever seen, and worthy to be fired from his autocannon.

#485 Smitti

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Posted 06 March 2014 - 04:02 AM

I love this thread, makes me lol for real.

Sparks helped me design a special alternating feed mechanism for my autocannon, enabling me to load his shoe into the breach when required instead of being fed from the ammo bins. Sparks' design was so beautifully efficient, it eclipsed the Ultra AC loading mechanism by miles, prompting cries of "P2Win!", "Balance is f**ked!" And "Nerf nao plx!" from others. Meta-warriors live in fear of this elegant, shoe-propelling piece of engineering brilliance, but how much damage can a motivated shoe REALLY do to a BattleMech, I hear you ask?



Well, you know that time you stomped out from behind a building and were insta-cored in your Atlas? Yeah.... HIGHLY motivated shoe indeed.

I call it The Neutraliser.

#486 StompingOnTanks

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Posted 06 March 2014 - 07:36 AM

The Neutraliser isn't Smitt's only notable engineering achievement either. Back in the 2980's, Shar Wolf, Sparks, XphR and I helped him design and prototype a completely new class of high-performance BattleMech called the Gundoom. It featured a fully articulated humanoid body, in-atmosphere and zero-G flight capabilities comparable to an Aerospace Fighter, a highly versatile handheld weapon system, and several never-before-seen weapon types including a Hyper Large Laser Rifle, a shield made from almost indestructible Super-Fibrous, and a highly deadly Laser Sword made out of a heavily modified Large Laser.

The Gundoom would have gone on to become the new standard in BattleMech design. However, when the Kuritans attacked our hidden space station to try and capture the Gundoom for themselves, Smittiferous's 13-year-old green-haired Asian son tried to pilot the Gundoom and save us, only to be killed in one shot by a Naval Autocannon blast. Smittiferous, Shar, Sparks, XphR and I barely escaped with our lives by cramming ourselves into the cockpit of my personal Aerospace fighter and flying the hell out of there.

We still mock him about it to this day.

#487 CyclonerM

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Posted 06 March 2014 - 07:52 AM

Marack Drock points out that the abbreviation of Clan Blood Spirit is "BS" but forgets that his own old Blood Scorpions could be abbreviated to "Clan BS". :P

EDIT: StompingOnTanks may lie about his age. In 3050 he supposedly has no less than 90 years on his shoulders. His hairs are obviously dyed and to mask his real age and decadent piloting skills he keeps posting in these forums instad of fighting in his Battlemech.

This, or he really was a little genius back in 2980 and helped designing a revolutionary new kind of BattleMech around the age of 12-20 :P

Edited by CyclonerM, 06 March 2014 - 07:57 AM.


#488 Alaskan Nobody

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Posted 06 March 2014 - 11:37 AM

Cycloner knows that about Stomp because he has more than 800 years on his shoulders.

But he has less than 40 on the rest of him.
(good old hand-me-downs....)

#489 Cactus In The Rear

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Posted 06 March 2014 - 02:01 PM

Shar Wolf is really a fox with low self esteem.

Edited by Xanilos, 06 March 2014 - 02:01 PM.


#490 Smitti

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Posted 07 March 2014 - 03:35 AM

Xanilos carries in his pocket a life-sized inflatable Atlas decoy.

He inflates it then hides behind some trees and waits for the enemy to start attacking, then runs rings around their legs with some heavy steel cable, tripping them up. He then proceeds to DFA them over and over again until they are crushed into the ground, or his leg actuators give out and internal structure bends, whichever happens first.


Seeing as he usually attempts this in a Locust jury-rigged with jump-jets, success is neither frequent nor easy. It doesn't help that he refuses to fight anything less than four times his 'Mech weight either.

#491 Cactus In The Rear

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Posted 07 March 2014 - 04:54 AM

Smittiferous is the reason that Trebuchets are smaller than Catapults.

#492 Son of the Flood

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Posted 07 March 2014 - 02:10 PM

Xanilos is a regular at the South Wall Cornerclub, so much so that when he greets the patrons with a heartfelt "afternoon everybody", they cheer in unison "XANILOS!!!!"

Many go there for the short-skirted waitresses, cold brews, and half price wings (Tuesday nights, while supplies last), but Xanilos goes there for a different reason.

You see, Xanilos knows that making the your way in the inner sphere today takes everything you've got...and taking a break from all your worries, sure would help a lot.

Xanilos likes to be where he can see, our troubles are all the same.....he wants to go where everybody knows his name.


Also, the South Wall Cornerclub has karaoke every Friday night and Xanilos is an absolute karaoke fiend.

#493 Cactus In The Rear

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Posted 07 March 2014 - 02:20 PM

Son of the Flood once flooded the Cornerclub and broke all the karaoke machines.

BTW the South Wall Cornerclub is the home to the thieves guild in the game Morrowind (swords,spells,that kind of thing AKA no tech).

Edited by Xanilos, 07 March 2014 - 02:40 PM.


#494 StompingOnTanks

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Posted 07 March 2014 - 04:45 PM

View PostXanilos, on 07 March 2014 - 02:20 PM, said:

Son of the Flood once flooded the Cornerclub and broke all the karaoke machines.

BTW the South Wall Cornerclub is the home to the thieves guild in the game Morrowind (swords,spells,that kind of thing AKA no tech).

-Reinstalls Morrowind.-



#495 Smitti

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Posted 08 March 2014 - 03:04 AM

StompingOnTanks is otherwise known as The Man.

Think about that next time you try to "stick it to The Man". All you're really doing is hurting poor Stomping.

#496 WonderSparks

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Posted 08 March 2014 - 04:10 AM

Smittiferous secretly cares a LOT about StompinOnTanks, but would never openly admit it!

#497 Sparks Murphey

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Posted 08 March 2014 - 04:35 AM

WonderSparks is no relation to me, despite the similarity in name, house of origin, facial structure, fingerprints, and DNA.

#498 StompingOnTanks

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Posted 08 March 2014 - 07:16 AM

Sparks Murphey replaces his mech's coolant with hot coco and flushes coolant whenever his teamates need to warm up. The back of his mech's left foot also has options for beer, vodka, fine wine, ice water, Hi-C Orange, Pepsi, Coke, and Fanta.

#499 Smitti

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Posted 08 March 2014 - 02:14 PM

StompingOnTanks has always thought Bitchin' Betty sounded rather sexy. One night he met her in a nightclub somewhere in the Periphery. One thing led to another, and they left together to go back to his dropship.

The next day, Tech support hotlines and maintenance bays were flooded by pilots and service crews alike, claiming that all through the night their Mech computers were "randomly" babbling alerts like "HEAT LEVEL CRITICAL" and "CRITICAL HIT: CENTRE TORSO".

Edited by Smittiferous, 08 March 2014 - 03:02 PM.


#500 StompingOnTanks

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Posted 08 March 2014 - 06:36 PM

View PostSmittiferous, on 08 March 2014 - 02:14 PM, said:

StompingOnTanks has always thought Bitchin' Betty sounded rather sexy. One night he met her in a nightclub somewhere in the Periphery. One thing led to another, and they left together to go back to his dropship.

The next day, Tech support hotlines and maintenance bays were flooded by pilots and service crews alike, claiming that all through the night their Mech computers were "randomly" babbling alerts like "HEAT LEVEL CRITICAL" and "CRITICAL HIT: CENTRE TORSO".


She did an emergency shut-down at least a dozen times that night. I almost blew her XL out. :ph34r:





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