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there is just a big divide between conquest and skirmish players..
This right here gets to a salient point that I think is at the center of a LOT of the problem you have going on. I kinda put two and two together and at least remained under 5.
When we had only Assault and Conquest, there was a very loud very constant "WE HATE CAPPING" refrain from a large minority of the population. They were in it for the deathmatch and got furious any time something other than that happened. PGI acquiesced and gave us Skirmish mode. There was a great sigh of relief from the populace as all the... skirmishers flooded QUICKLY into their new sandbox and Assault and Conquest got much quieter as the din of those Skirmishers was silenced. Then when someone complained about cap the were sharply reminded "Shut up and go play Skirmish".
Problem solved on one side of the coin... but for the other?
Now starts the ugly cry from the Skirmish pit: STOP PEOPLE FROM HIDING ON US AND MAKE THEM DIE!!!!! Yes friends, the 'you can't hide! Hiding's against CoC' argument came out. It was, of course quickly snuffed by the Mods and Devs who said "we warned you this would happen and no you can't ban them". (This answer was not sufficient, so it has been ignored and the cry still goes on.) The Devs went on to clarify "They fought and decided to make you play hide and go seek, now go find and kill them." Because of this, the rage built over in the skirmish pit because "griefers" were making them poor fat assaults run... slowly... all over the map looking for them. They demand (still) that they just run out of bounds or suicide and are reminded that doing so constitutes a violation of CoC. Then they'd demand the right to just shoot them in the face. Most who were hiding would say "no, come and find me." So, all was not well in the skirmish pit and the bitterness between skirmishers and the rest remained hot and sharp.
So here we sit. Two minorities, but together they make up the majority of players who want their autonomy from one another. (the real minority is sitting there going "Who cares! Let's just play already!") Neither side wants much if anything to do with the other and are happy to let each have their own gameplay modes and do not want to be forced into the same batch as those who constantly derided them in the past from both sides. This shows in varying degrees, and is not an all or none proposition to be sure.
The point is, you cannot make both sides happy playing together when they do not respect the way the other plays the game. You have two fiercely passionate sides who WILL NOT COMPROMISE with one another and would rather quit and do something else than play together. This lingering rift is the reason you are never going to get voting to work. It has the passion and fierceness of a political campaign or religious war. Look honestly and deeply enough at it, and you'll see this is fairly true. It's based on emotion, not reason, past hurts and principles not common sense and compromise.
Lastly, there are also two core philosophies at war here: those desiring strategic/tactical simulation, and those desiring an FPS arena. The two have a middle ground, but where the balance resides is such a thin line, and easily shifted, you can almost guarantee to be too far for most on both sides which will always lead to a majority of criticism. Go too far to the simulation, and you get the shooters going "BOOOORRRRING!!!" Go too far to the arena and you get the simulators going "STUUUUUUUPID!!!" Unfortunately, sit in the middle and you get "STUPID AND BORING!!!!" from both sides while the true "let's just play" minority sits in the middle disgusted at both.
In the end, most will probably disagree with this analysis for the exact reasons I say it exists. Bitterness and anger from both sides with no interest of compromise, and a desire to burn it all to the ground if they don't get their way. They were given a solution of being able to just not play with one another and that had formed an easy cease fire and possibly someday a peace, but never an integration.
So, let's just leave it alone and just try to grow all three communities as a whole?
The Conquistadors and the Skirmishers and those in the muddy muddy middle.