915 replies to this topic

[Tustle]

A huge mechanical nightmare? Or...a huge mess of

SCIENCE?!

AH HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA H-hack cough sputter etc. Ahem.

940. The Company is in no ways backed by this "Agatha Heterodyne" and any and all affiliates. Whoever convinced the rookies that infantry would be rolling "death rays" in the field Soon™ should expect a dock to their pay shortly.

Edited by Tank Man, 11 October 2014 - 08:25 PM.

[Alaskan Nobody]

Tank Man, on 11 October 2014 - 08:25 PM, said:

SCIENCE?!

[SnagaDance]

941: Agatha Heterodyne's prefered mech is indeed the Jaeger (with a fancy hat).

[Colby Boucher]

942: You may not "love and tolerate the **** out of" your pony quote spewing lance mates, no matter how much you hate them.

[StompingOnTanks]

You mean like this?

[Mattiator]

StompingOnTanks, on 13 October 2014 - 11:09 AM, said:

-snip-

Saved for future use, if that's alright~

943: While it is fully acceptable to paint and style your Urbanmech in the ancient style of a "hot rod", attempts to procure the 300XL engine from the CO's Jenner for this purpose will result in disciplinary action.

Edited by Mattiator, 13 October 2014 - 12:45 PM.

[Sizzles]

944: Don't ever laugh at the company Hunchback pilot . . .
945: Using the CO's Jagermech as a massive Keg for the Regimental picnic is ill advised.
945-B: Doing an Atlas sized Keg-stands on said Jagerkeg is also ill advised.

Edited by Sizzles, 13 October 2014 - 07:31 PM.

[Tustle]

946. The only time you should be using your 'mech to assist in repairs is when you're in the field; don't even think about helping the techs in your 20+ ton walking robot war vehicle of death and destruction.

946 b. TO BE CLEAR, STOP FIRING LASERS IN THE HANGER! THESE THINGS ARE NOT THE SAME AS THE WELDING LASERS THE TECHS USE! Was the germaphobe tip not clear enough about lasers in the hanger being bad?!

947. Corporal(?) Tinn Kann [the 'Tank Man'] hand-polishes his Centurion every night. He's therefore not very happy to see...'stains' on the left foot's toe plating the next morning. If you are the one "having relations" on his BattleMech, he wishes to advise you now; run. Run very far, very fast. Do not look back. Do not look down. Keep running. And with any luck, you'll be out of range of his LRM launchers by the time he finds out it was you.

947 b. He will not care how "smoking hot" she was, nor accept likewise favors or excuses of "your 'mech was closer." He will attempt to destroy you. Be thankful it isn't everything you hold dear as well.

947 c. Be further advised, he does know the override codes if he has to use them to get said Centurion out and after you, and if earlier tips are any indication he's buddy-buddy with the techs anyway. Just RUN.

947 d. ...the running amuses him.

[Darth Futuza]

948. Anyone with information about the whereabouts of Private Sam Gunther and/or the technician Julia Slynn is requested to come forth immediately.

[kingalbertII]

Darth Futuza, on 14 October 2014 - 09:58 AM, said:

948. Anyone with information about the whereabouts of Private Sam Gunther and/or the technician Julia Slynn is requested to come forth immediately.

last i saw him he was buying a jenner i think

949: the jumpship schedule from the mess is missing. should you know its whereabouts contact your nearest supply officer

[Tustle]

Darth Futuza, on 14 October 2014 - 09:58 AM, said:

948. Anyone with information about the whereabouts of Private Sam Gunther and/or the technician Julia Slynn is requested to come forth immediately.

kingalbertII, on 14 October 2014 - 11:25 PM, said:

last i saw him he was buying a jenner i think

949: the jumpship schedule from the mess is missing. should you know its whereabouts contact your nearest supply officer

...I can't tell if I should be laughing maniacally, chasing Gunther down in the Sgt. Death (the Centurion), or both. I like the sound of both. ._.

950. Naming your BattleMech after BattleMechs in speculative fictions is silly. Even sillier if it's a nickname the protagonist gave the in-novel 'mech when a child.
(read MechWarrior Dark Age 3, the Ruins of Power, now!)

[Sizzles]

Tank Man, on 15 October 2014 - 08:55 AM, said:

950. Naming your BattleMech after BattleMechs in speculative fictions is silly. Even sillier if it's a nickname the protagonist gave the in-novel 'mech when a child.
(read MechWarrior Dark Age 3, the Ruins of Power, now!)

Sargent Death . . . Paging Sargent Death . . .

951. While Auto Cannons do make great super sized spud guns. Your technicians do not enjoy scraping baked potato off the barrel walls.

[990Dreams]

951 a. No, the spud would incinerate before anything would happen.

[Alaskan Nobody]

DavidHurricane, on 16 October 2014 - 06:50 AM, said:

951 a. No, the spud would incinerate before anything would happen.

Then you get to clean the ashes out.

They may be at the atomic level - but that just makes them more the pain to clean

952. Do not mess with Intensively OCD Techs

[990Dreams]

953. Do not try to use your Mech's computer to compute the QED Magnetic Moment. The last time that happened we were cleaning up the burnt silicon for weeks.

[Darth Futuza]

953a. Mech targeting computer's should also not be used to attempt to solve jump point calculations. This is what your JumpShip's computer and staff is for, please let them do their job, and stop making us replace your targeting computers.

[pvtjamesr]

Just wanna say "nuking it from orbit" is a viable tactic (its the only way to be sure), LBX autocannons are boomsticks, and the people under my command are evil minions.

[StompingOnTanks]

pvtjamesr, on 16 October 2014 - 09:03 PM, said:

Just wanna say "nuking it from orbit" is a viable tactic (its the only way to be sure), LBX autocannons are boomsticks, and the people under my command are evil minions.

You're fired.

[Alaskan Nobody]

StompingOnTanks, on 17 October 2014 - 12:25 PM, said:

You're fired.

From orbit

[Darth Futuza]

Shar Wolf, on 17 October 2014 - 12:56 PM, said:

From orbit

Just to make sure.