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Non-Combat Tips (Parody List)


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#241 B0oN

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Posted 08 March 2014 - 08:06 AM

#531 : Combining StompingOnTanks and TankMan into one entity would form Voltron, so no to that . Absolutely no .

#242 MnDragon

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Posted 08 March 2014 - 08:08 AM

532. The next technician that puts 12 jump jets on LT Maximillian Bohannon's Spider and not tell him will receive a court martial. ESPECIALLY if he yells over comms "Jinx put Max in space!!!!"

edit: fixed the ninja number

Edited by MnDragon, 08 March 2014 - 06:38 PM.


#243 StompingOnTanks

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Posted 08 March 2014 - 08:36 AM

View PostRad Hanzo, on 08 March 2014 - 08:06 AM, said:

#531 : Combining StompingOnTanks and TankMan into one entity would form Voltron, so no to that . Absolutely no .


Actually it'd form this.

Posted Image



#244 Nathan Foxbane

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Posted 08 March 2014 - 10:53 AM

View PostRad Hanzo, on 08 March 2014 - 08:06 AM, said:

#531 : Combining StompingOnTanks and TankMan into one entity would form Voltron, so no to that . Absolutely no .

No, it would look like this, but the M variant not the 3 or 4:
Posted Image

#245 Tustle

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Posted 08 March 2014 - 03:35 PM

533 (since Mndragon's addition is technically 532). If you can configure a mech' capable of striking at multiple ranges and you can pilot it competently; then pat yourself on the back Mechwarrior. Good work.

533 b. If you can configure a glass cannon of a mech' [confirmation: little/no armor, high firepower and speed] and can pilot that competently on the field; then pat yourself on the back you monster. Good work.

534. If you configure your Jagermech/K2 Catapult into a 'Boomjager'/'Splatcat' and can not make that work on the field and thus continually give the technicians grief due to this; get the hell out of this battalion.

534 b. Stop playing the damn twitch shooters, get in the simulators, learn to pilot and then we'll talk about your reinstatement.

535. Be advised that any rules involving 'Boomjagers' and 'Splatcats' added by [rookie Tinn Kann the 'Tank Man'] are not added out of malice but out of begrudging respect for the things. Despite all the times he's been cored by them, giving his technicians grief as a result. He actually gives them grief every time he goes out in his Centurion since odds are good he'll lose an arm on the poor thing for sure...

Edited by Tank Man, 08 March 2014 - 03:37 PM.


#246 StompingOnTanks

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Posted 08 March 2014 - 06:32 PM

View PostTank Man, on 08 March 2014 - 03:35 PM, said:

533 (since Mndragon's addition is technically 532). If you can configure a mech' capable of striking at multiple ranges and you can pilot it competently; then pat yourself on the back Mechwarrior. Good work.


Practically all of my favorite builds do this and I think I do pretty darn well with them.

Where's my medal and bowl of Captain Crunch?

Edited by StompingOnTanks, 08 March 2014 - 06:32 PM.


#247 Tustle

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Posted 08 March 2014 - 09:39 PM

View PostStompingOnTanks, on 08 March 2014 - 06:32 PM, said:


Practically all of my favorite builds do this and I think I do pretty darn well with them.

Where's my medal and bowl of Captain Crunch?


Seriously? High five we need more of them :ph34r:

Also the rule said pat YOURSELF on the back. Yourself. >_>

Edited by Tank Man, 08 March 2014 - 09:40 PM.


#248 Alaskan Nobody

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Posted 08 March 2014 - 09:44 PM

View PostTank Man, on 08 March 2014 - 09:39 PM, said:

Also the rule said pat YOURSELF on the back. Yourself. >_>

He doesn't have arms - just another pair of legs for stomping better with :ph34r:

#249 Tustle

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Posted 08 March 2014 - 10:03 PM

View PostShar Wolf, on 08 March 2014 - 09:44 PM, said:

He doesn't have arms - just another pair of legs for stomping better with :ph34r:


Ohhh. Well feces. I did not think that rule through...

Wait...how's he controllin' his mech' then? That...going completely bonkers mind control way? >.>

Edited by Tank Man, 08 March 2014 - 10:04 PM.


#250 Alaskan Nobody

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Posted 08 March 2014 - 10:17 PM

View PostTank Man, on 08 March 2014 - 10:03 PM, said:

Wait...how's he controllin' his mech' then?

By stomping tanks obviously :(
No fancy tech involved (try not to think about it to much though) :ph34r:

#251 Tustle

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Posted 08 March 2014 - 10:56 PM

.................my brain. It bleeds. Confound you both! Yes you too, scary stomper guy, even if you aren't here doing anything! GAH HOW DOES HE TYPE

536. Pilots may not add to the non-combat tips list no more than twice consecutively.

537. If the amount of posts between the tips list starts to exceed the four-post minimum there will be some editing done. Or else.

538. Mechwarrior [Shar Wolf] is not allowed to devise plans involving psychological warfare. Even we have limits here.

Edited by Tank Man, 08 March 2014 - 11:00 PM.


#252 Alaskan Nobody

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Posted 08 March 2014 - 11:21 PM

View PostTank Man, on 08 March 2014 - 10:56 PM, said:

538. Mechwarrior [Shar Wolf] is not allowed to devise plans involving psychological warfare. Even we have limits here.

What is sad is I don't even really have to try sometimes.......

Other times of course I spend months wondering how I did it! :ph34r:


Edit: I did warn you not to think to much about it.

Edited by Shar Wolf, 08 March 2014 - 11:25 PM.


#253 StompingOnTanks

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Posted 09 March 2014 - 07:02 AM

View PostTank Man, on 08 March 2014 - 09:39 PM, said:


Seriously? High five we need more of them :)

Also the rule said pat YOURSELF on the back. Yourself. >_>


-Hi fives.- :)

I love builds that mix different ranges and weapon types. I have a few specialist mechs but don't play them as much.

539. Making "Your Mom's (insert you know what)" jokes about Stalkers within radio range of a Stalker pilot is basically suicide.
540. Picking up a tank, shoving your arm through the back, and using it as a shield is not recommended if the crew is still inside.
541. You shall not use Black Magic to turn the tides of battle, even if you are absolutely capable of doing so.
541a. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD do not summon Robo-Zalgo, SlenderAtlas, Mecha-Cthulu, or other predatory/apocalyptic robotic entities. The Inner Sphere has enough problems already.

#254 Tustle

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Posted 09 March 2014 - 08:28 AM

View PostShar Wolf, on 08 March 2014 - 11:21 PM, said:

I did warn you not to think to much about it.

You did...you did.

Confound you and your sorcery anyway :D

View PostStompingOnTanks, on 09 March 2014 - 07:02 AM, said:


-Hi fives.- :)

I love builds that mix different ranges and weapon types. I have a few specialist mechs but don't play them as much.


-Hi fived- Mixed range loadouts for the win! :)

#255 Cactus In The Rear

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Posted 09 March 2014 - 08:45 AM

542. You shall not go off topic in this thread - that's what the last post wins thread and PMs are for.

#256 990Dreams

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Posted 09 March 2014 - 10:05 AM

543: Rule 544 doesn't exist
544: Rule 543 doesn't exist
545: Solve that for a cookie

#257 Cactus In The Rear

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Posted 09 March 2014 - 10:22 AM

543. Giving new pilots XL engines is NOT permitted,and you will have to pay for the repairs.

Edited by Xanilos, 09 March 2014 - 10:52 AM.


#258 StompingOnTanks

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Posted 09 March 2014 - 10:48 AM

Just wanted to say I'm surprised by how much this thread has grown (I really didn't expect it to go this far) and that you all are awesome. :)

Here, I made you all internet cookies.

OOOOOOOOOO

OOOOOOOOOO

OOOOOOOOOO

OOOOOOOOOO

First two batches are chocolate chip, others are peanut butter.


Edited by StompingOnTanks, 09 March 2014 - 10:49 AM.


#259 IraqiWalker

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Posted 09 March 2014 - 11:01 AM

-om nom noms three cookies-

Quite tasty, thank you very much.

544. Accepting internet cookies should be done with care, unless you are suicidal.

#260 Cactus In The Rear

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Posted 09 March 2014 - 11:02 AM

545. Those cookies were filled with internet laxatives - your computer will crap out on you. :)





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